Please give me a call

I wanna get back into You.
Wanna be held by You're loving arms again.
I know You are the only one who knows what I need most.
You are the only one who could make my heart at peace.
I want to be near You. It's been a very long time since I feel You beside me.
I know You didn't fail to give me a call, maybe I'm always outta reach.
Please call me louder. whisper into this heart of mine.
You are the only one I trusted in this world full of fear, pain and doubt.
Give me a love that's not painful. Calm my heart and mind just like what You did to
the stormy seas..
I'll be waiting for You're calling.
I hope It's not too late for me to try.
Give me love that's not painful anymore. Give me love that will bring me peace, and true happiness.. I know only You can give me that... I don't wanna cry anymore. I hope you end the mourning... Tell me what you wanted. I'll be willing to leave everything for what You can have me. Just tell me...

Gusto kong tumakbo. Sa walang makakahabol.
Gusto kong sumigaw. Sa walang makakarinig.
Gusto kong matulog. Ng mahimbing at di magigising.
Gusto kong tumawa. Ng walang pagkukunwari.
Gusto kong sumayaw. Hanggang sa mapagod.
At sa dulo ng lahat ng ito, sana mahanap ko na ang puso ko.
Ang puso kong payapa at hindi takot o pagod.
Ang pusong wala ng bahid ng sakit.
Ang pusong kaya kang mahalin ng buo.
Ang pusong nakahingi na ng tawad sa Diyos.
Ang pusong dapat sayo lang ihandog.

" Minsan kailangan mong madapa, para malaman mong kaya mong tumayo mag-isa, kailangan mong masaktan para malaman mong nakakaramdam ka, kailangan mong tumakbo para may marating ka, at kailangan mong mag-isa para makita mo kun sino ka...."

My heart beats too much then..
Now..
My heart weeps too much.
Cries too much..
Hurts too much..
It forgets to love unconditionally..
Care deeply...
Forgive easily...
Is it still a heart in here.. Or it turns into stone...

Since I was young I always wanna do things the right way... because at the end of the hard day I get to have a good sleep... Even if its the hard way, as long as it,s right I always go for it. Then it all comes down to this point. I have loved and in loving I have lost.
Will it be too late to do the right thing? God knows I don't wanna hurt people anymore. People that was so dear to me. Or is this the punishment God has given me for not doing things the right way? God knows I don' t wanna leave you. And only God knows how much I feel for you... If I end it this way. I still hope, i just end the suffering. if God give me a chance to be with you again, i promise Him to do things His way. i promise Him not to make you hurt, not to make you suffer in me. I wanna love you the right way.. i wanna be with you the right way.. for you deserve to be treated and loved the right way... It torns me apart everytime I had to be not so nice on you, for you to stop loving me. I want to be better for you. I want to change my world for you.. I wanna sleep wellbeside you... Not hurting you, and not feeling hurt. Not making you worry, and not worrying... I hope if I say goodbye, I can also say see you later... You can hate me for hurting you now,I will understand, but please don't hate me too much. I hope you still spare me your little love. I will always keep you in my heart..... Boo... T.T

Bakit kailangan ganito.... Bakit kailangan maglakad ako sa gitna ng desyerto para makita ka. Isa Kang bukal ng matamis na tubig sa gitna ng desyerto na naghihintay ng pag-aalga. At para masilayan ka, kailangan kong Iwan ang lilim na Ito. Kailangan kong tunguhin ang landas na Hindi ko tyak ang pupuntahan. Ngunit pinilit ko paring subukan, Kahit nag-iisa, nglakad ako sa gitna ng tuyong lupa ng nakatapak, walang lilim, sa paglalakbay naramdaman ko unti-unti ang hapdi, ang bawat tinik na aking nakatapakan habang daan. Bumabaon sa bawat patuloy na paghakbang.. Nandito kna. Ipinanapngakong hindi ako mauuhaw. Ngunit paano mo ggamutin ang sugat ko. Paano mabubunot ang lhat ng tinik na nakuha ko para mkpunta sayo. Sobrang sakit. Sobrang hirap....

If I could.... I would. Yet I should.

If I could just smile everyday I would, yet I should not be faking my pain.
If I could just make you smile everyday I would, yet I should not fool you with pretention.
If I could just walk away from past I would, yet I should face it.
If I could not cry in front of you I would, yet I should let my hurt out.
If I could meet you first I would, yet I should admit that I meet him first.
If I could not cause you pain I would, yet I should let you see the world I'm with.
If I could be perfect I would, yet I should accept I can't be.
If I could take the pain you feel I would.
If I could forget everything I would.
If I could love you more than you love me I would.
If I could like you more than you like me I would.
If I could make you forget me I would so you could be happy.
If I could bring back the me I would.
but I know I should always be real to you, to the hurt I feel, to the things I think, and I should let you know my wound and everything in me, towards others and towards you...

Candid memories of the past

Endearing charm of my wounded heart

Save me from my pain inside

Angel from up above

Raise your wings and fly me up

Calm the tempest from my heart

Anxious mind that's torn apart

Read my eyes weeping every night

Inside the masquerade of smiles

Nostalgia that homes in

Over night fall I pray it'll end somehow..